{"id":11,"date":"2020-10-13T20:41:20","date_gmt":"2020-10-13T20:41:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/?p=11"},"modified":"2020-10-14T20:00:01","modified_gmt":"2020-10-14T20:00:01","slug":"lonely-sea-lions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/2020\/10\/13\/lonely-sea-lions\/","title":{"rendered":"Lonely Sea Lions"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

“There are no females here. Period.” — Disgruntled young bachelor Sea Lion<\/p>wished to remain anonymous <\/cite><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Dating outlook has been grim on the ship docks lately as over a hundred male bachelor Sea Lions crowd in together to strut their stuff, bark literally all day and night (never giving it a darn rest) and doing keen tricks off the dock. “Back flip and caught a Rockfish! Bro! Brooooo!!!!” <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But one thing is missing in the exciting lives of these single bachelor Sea Lions, they’re lonely and wanting love. Every Sea Lion in the photo below is male. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
“I thought this would be a party atmosphere with mingling…” — Ted the Sea Lion, #35 on the Left<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

When asked how neighbors viewed the none stop partying the Sea Lions present said, “BRO! Bro, bro, BRO!” in a series of barks. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Several said after winter they planned to swim out to the coast of California and see if they could “find some action” but if not the non-stop party atmosphere was, “killer!BRO, BRO!” <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Some quieter Sea Lions pine for a more settled domestic life and finding true love and feel pressured into the party-boy lifestyle of the group. For them love is not on the horizon. “It’s like if there was a female here she would only be interested in the largest, strongest, and most fierce Sea Lion. With the ladies these days it’s all about who catches the Salmon and never about literature and science. I don’t know if I’m going to bother swimming west this year.” <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hundreds of bachelor-ready-to-party California Sea Lions have packed the dock, but for some it’s a lonely sojourn. What is the outlook for single Sea Lions? <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":13,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[10,4],"tags":[14,12,13,11],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26,"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11\/revisions\/26"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dysmalnitch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}